The Madelyn Show

Rarely do I get to go shopping without at least one trip to the restroom. (It's the downside of having 3 daughters.) While at a store last week, Madelyn informed me that she needed to go to the loo. This time, however, instead of sharing a stall, she insisted on going into one by herself. I try to encourage my children to be independent as long as they are safe. Since I didn't see any immediate danger and I was going to be in the stall right next to her, I let her have her way. I hope this isn't too graphic, but the following is what the other women in the restroom heard:

Madelyn: Okay, Mom. I am sitting on the toilet, but I am not touching it with my hands. I am not touching aaaaanyfing with my hands because I don't want to get germs. I am being very careful. I am not even touching that garbage with the really yucky stuff moms put in it. Are you proud of me, Mom?

Me: Yes, Maddie. I am very proud of you.

Madelyn: I am peeing now, Mom! Do you hear that? Are you peeing? Oh! Nevermind. I hear you! I hear you peeing!

Me: Yes, Maddie. {praying that she will read my mind and be quiet now}

Madelyn: I guess I have to go poop too. {grunts and exhales loudly} I always cry when I go poo poo. Why is that Mom? Isn't that silly? I am crying!

Me: {afraid to speak}

Madelyn: Okay. I'm done. I'm done now, Mom. I am going to wipe now. Are you proud of me? I'm getting some toilet paper, but not too much. I'm wiping from front to back- just like you told me! {moments later I hear a flush} Now I'm going to wash my hands!!!


Being a mom is great. {sigh}